koko & everything else

koko & everything else

Monday, December 13, 2010

To find or not to find a DATE?



This morning while I was taking a shower, my mind was flying wild with my imagination and it dragged me to think about dating.

Dating or hooking up is hard. The hassle of getting to know people is a mind-blowing exhausting activity that I don’t like to drag myself into. Then there’s also the risk of meeting borderline psychos that could be fatal.

I’ve had my share of scary or funny dating stories. Some are quite nice to talk about, especially if it’s the funny in a “blooper” kind of way, but some, I don’t dare to share. Just the mere thought of it makes me cringe.

Then as soon as I went out of the bathroom, I asked the first three people I saw: my mom, my yaya and my guy friend who slept over the night before.

Is it so hard to date? Or is it harder to find a date?

Well, both are hard. But I guess the quick conversation led me to the thought that finding a date is harder. It’s not because less and less people are available, but it’s more of the “how to attract people and let them know I am worth the try” kinda thing.

This made me pause a little bit. They were right; getting someone’s attention is harder than actually being on a date. The first step is always the hard one huh?

My mom said it’s all about the physical appearance. Yes, people may say they don’t care about looks but then, it’s always the looks of a person that catches the first glance. Once you’re hooked with the looks, then you’ll be tempted to get-to-know the person. And that’s the only time you’ll get to appreciate the personality. Hooking up/Dating usually goes this pattern: “Outside then Inside” and not the other way around.

She (my mom) has a point. Yeah, no matter how many people swear that they don’t care about the looks, they are bound to get hooked by it no matter what.

So… if this is the case… isn’t it a little too discriminating? I mean, let’s face it, not everyone are blessed with Angelina Jolie lips, Katy Perry eyes and Megan Fox body. How about the rest of us? If you’re the average gal around the corner… who would dare ask you out if you’re standing next to a Barbie doll look alike?

Maybe that’s why online chatting had been invented. I mean, even without the flawless looks, you could attract people through conversation. But then, I tried one of those chat rooms, I met quite a lot of people I enjoyed chatting with but when I met them up personally… I died with boredom plus they weren’t really eye-candy.

So maybe it’s good to try speed dating? I haven’t really tried it… but then, at least you get to talk to the actual person, even in a very limited time. And you would be pressured to talk to them even without the physical attraction coz you are bound to sit in front of them for a time. I mean, the person’s there… the least you could do is talk…
So with all these mumbo jumbo of dating… what have I really learned?

That it’s best to know your best assets and enhance it… both outside and inside. If you have quite nice pair of eyes… why not improve it with make-up or something? or if you got nice legs, wear shorts. Then don’t forget what’s there on the inside… show your sense of humor… intelligence… your free spirit or whatever. Maybe the key is balance. You may not be as hot as Beyonce or as funny as Ellen Degeneres… but at least you got a bit of a thing or two you can be confident about…

Or maybe, if you believe in fate and destiny…. it is just a matter of being the right package for the right person. But to the rest of the world like me, it wouldn’t hurt to be a better person… it would be easier to market a good product with a little advertisements than a bad product with false ads. And don’t forget to improve physically… sometimes it’s also about the packaging.

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